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I always find a nice gentle irony in the fact that my blog is called “Life Beyond The List”, yet I pretty much live my life through lists. At work, i’m the queen of the to-do list, and at home, it’s pretty much the same. Only lately, that irony hasn’t felt so nice and gentle. It’s felt downright irritating and uncomfortable.
When did i become incapable of spontaneity? I used to be capable of it, pretty sure about that. In fact, I used to be really darn good at it! But recently, anything “off plan”, whether it’s a food item on a menu, a trip somewhere, or even a drink with the girls, has become a chore, another thing on the list, something that requires its own mini plan of how to get there and enjoy it. And that can be fraught with anxiety, much like the type that Gen Y blogger, Rebecca Thorman describes over at Modite. Just like her, i find myself ‘nesting’ my way out of anxiety, staying home or ducking out to avoid the stress related with erm, having fun. Just like her, i’m a highly productive member of the workforce, can be counted on to do the right things by my friends (remember, i always have a plan!), and I’m sure I’m enriching my life by ticking off things on the big, fat to do list. Only, it would be nice if sometimes i could switch off the list making freak in my brain, and just chill out.
The problem came home to roost last night, at mine and Rick’s Lindy Hop class. The class last night was all about improvisation. The art of letting go and doing something off-plan, off-message, off the beat, whatever! Just going with the flow and seeing where your feet, and the music, took you. Well, hands up for guessing who found that a problem? I pride myself on being able to follow choreography well. Not so good when the choreography is non-existent! Even my inherent dancing skills couldn’t save me from my very English reticence and control-freakery terror of not knowing what to do next! In the end, I managed to let go, and even, gasp, enjoy myself. But it was a long road!
I took a good lesson away from dance class last night. And no, it wasn’t just the belly slide move, although that was a good one! It was to try and re-train my brain in the art of thinking off-plan. Even just some of the time. I think it would re-energize my creative juices and enable me to get back to the person i was in my 20s. Without the mini skirts and caked on bronzer. Ahem.
So, I couldn’t let too many days of October slip by without setting some new goals, as prompted by the fabulous Modite. Even though my goals here are purely lifestyle-oriented (no work stuff can really make its way onto a blog about what to do when you’re not at work now can it?), I can see the holistic benefits in my overall work/life balance if I can manage to stick to them.
To recap, here were my September goals:
- As I’m getting married in October, my main goal is to plan a stress-free, low-key wedding that Rick and I will both remember forever: Aaaah, only a few days to go, and all still good (barring a few minor emergencies that have shortened my life span a tad…)
- This is still a nascent blog, so I’d like to increase my readership by at least 10% this month: A big fat YES! Thanks to all of you, my lovely readers, and i hope i can continue the upward trend.
- Plan out fun trips with R to NYC in October and the UK at Christmas: Done and done!
- Finally harvest my herbs I’ve been nurturing outside all summer (basil, thyme and sage), then actually incorporate them into new recipes!: Still a hmmm next to this, I might have to admit defeat, but there is still time for those babies to grow!
- Remember to spend quality time with my friends, when I’m not a) working, b) working out, c) blogging, d) talking to the dog, Sophie, e) planning aforementioned low-key wedding, f) watching SYTYCD and Glee, g) practicing Lindy Hop with R: This I can categorically and happily say a yes to. For some happy and not so happy reasons, I’m proud to say I’ve been there for my girls when they’ve needed me. And of course, it’s been a ton of fun.
Onto to October! This is what I’m thinking:
- Overhaul and update my wardrobe for Fall/Winter: At the age of 32 (nearly 33, eeek!), you’d think i’d manage to have some sort of capsule wardrobe, filled with classics and the odd ‘wow’ piece, right? Wrong. I still lack even the most basic good quality T-shirts and layering jerseys, let along any other foundational staples. So this is the month. I need to clear stuff out, give s**t away to the Goodwill and build on what i have left. Promise.
- Conquer my nascent fear of flying: I have NO idea why I’m suddenly jittery about flying, after many happy years of short and long-haul trips. I mean seriously. I was that girl who actually looked forward to in-flight food. I’m not happy about it, so need to nix the problem. Being a generally practical and can-do kinda gal, I’ve invested in a couple good books/podcasts, and also a day long clinic in Dec, so I’m on the right track.
- Master at least one great new recipe: Rick and I have been so busy recently, that home-made turkey chili is about as adventuresome as it’s gotten. Time to break out something new.
- Spend at least one day this month completely and blissfully free of chores, admin, or ‘to-dos’: I get it, it’s kind of ironic coming from a girl who’s all about lists! But even with a small wedding, i just seem to have spent all my free time recently engaged in ticking stuff off lists. Time to kick back and enjoy an unplanned day. This might be the hardest thing i’ve ever tried!
- Oh, and last but never least – enjoy being married!
I know what you’re thinking, these are all a bit too easy. And i agree. (But ask me that in a month when i haven’t achieved and i might be weeping tears of frustration over them!) But I’m getting married this month!! So i’m planning one easy month, before getting back to something a little more challenging. Which I’ll explain in a month’s time!
Inspired by a couple of my new favorite blogs, NYC Full Heart and Modite, I thought it would be a good time to think about some life goals for September. It’s shaping up to be quite a month! As this meant to be a blog about the time when you’re NOT at work, I didn’t include career goals, but instead, thought about some of the other areas in my life that could do a with a little more dedication!
Here they are:
September Life Goals
- As I’m getting married in October, my main goal is to plan a stress-free, low-key wedding that Rick and I will both remember forever
- This is still a nascent blog, so I’d like to increase my readership by at least 10% this month
- Plan out fun trips with R to NYC in October and the UK at Christmas
- Finally harvest my herbs I’ve been nurturing outside all summer (basil, thyme and sage), then actually incorporate them into new recipes!
- Remember to spend quality time with my friends, when I’m not a) working, b) working out, c) blogging, d) talking to the dog, Sophie, e) planning aforementioned low-key wedding, f) watching SYTYCD and Glee, g) practicing Lindy Hop with R.
Yeah, going to be an interesting month!
